Songwriting Advice
How to Write Lyrics About Columns
You want a song about columns that does not sound like a museum tour or a spreadsheet lecture. Good. Columns are secretly savage. They are support and show off at once. They hold up roofs. They divide pages. They stack data like cold soldiers. Columns are perfect for songs because they are visual and emotional at the same time. This guide gives you concrete angles, lyric devices, melody tips, production moves, and ready made exercises so you can write a song about columns that makes people laugh, feel, and maybe cry into their coffee while staring at a building façade.
Quick Interruption: Ever wondered how huge artists end up fighting for their own songs? The answer is in the fine print. Learn the lines that protect you. Own your masters. Keep royalties. Keep playing shows without moving back in with Mom. Find out more →
Quick Links to Useful Sections
- Why Columns Are Amazing Song Material
- Pick Your Column Angle
- Angle A: Architectural column as support
- Angle B: Column as division
- Angle C: Newspaper column as voice
- Angle D: Spreadsheet column as data and surveillance
- Angle E: Column as poetic device
- Choose One Promise and Write It Plain
- Lyric Devices for Column Songs
- Personification
- Double meaning
- Anaphora
- Image stack
- Callback
- Enjambment
- Prosody and Melody Tips for Column Lyrics
- Rhyme Choices That Keep the Image Sharp
- Song Structures That Support Column Songs
- Structure A: Verse Pre Chorus Chorus Repeat
- Structure B: Verse Chorus Verse Chorus Bridge Chorus
- Structure C: Strophic form with a chorus like a pillar
- Arrangement And Production Ideas
- Title Ideas You Can Steal And Twist
- Writing Prompts And Exercises
- Object Swap
- Angle Drill
- Vowel Pass
- Spreadsheet Confessional
- Headline Game
- Before And After Line Rewrites
- The Crime Scene Edit For Column Lyrics
- Common Mistakes And Quick Fixes
- Demo Workflow To Finish Fast
- Lyrics Examples You Can Model
- Example 1: Architectural breakup chorus
- Example 2: Spreadsheet confessional chorus
- Terms And Acronyms Explained With Relatable Scenarios
- Pop Culture And Real Life Examples To Steal From
- Common Questions Answered
- Can I write a serious song about columns without sounding dumb
- Which column type should I use if I want to sound clever
- How do I avoid sounding pretentious when using architectural terms
- Is the spreadsheet metaphor overused
- How do I make the chorus catchy when the subject is odd
This is written for millennial and Gen Z artists who want a usable workflow without the fluff. Expect punchy exercises you can do in the subway, examples you can steal and rework, and a ruthless editing checklist that strips any line that smells like textbook. We will cover metaphor mapping, narrative angles, prosody, rhyme, structure, hooks, arrangement, demo tactics, and a stash of title ideas. We will also explain any jargon so you never feel dumb in a session.
Why Columns Are Amazing Song Material
Columns are an excellent lyrical subject because they are concrete and flexible. They are a physical object you can see and touch. They are an idea you can bend into emotional meaning. They are also a technical term in multiple worlds which gives you layered metaphor options. Use one image and it can mean stability. Use two images and it can mean confinement. Use columns in a line and you can slide between architecture and opinion with one breath.
- Image first Columns are easy to place in the camera of the listener. A Corinthian capital, a newspaper column, a column of text on a phone screen. Those are quick pictures.
- Dual life They are both structure and story. They hold things up and keep things apart. That duality is songwriting meat.
- Rich names Doric, Ionic, Corinthian. Those names sound like characters you either want to date or challenge to a duel.
- Everyday columns Spreadsheet columns and social media columns let you land a modern joke or a bitter truth about metrics.
Pick Your Column Angle
You cannot write every column metaphor in one chorus. Pick an angle and commit. Here are primary angles with examples and a one line promise you can turn into a title.
Angle A: Architectural column as support
Promise line: You held up more than you asked to hold.
Use this if you want a tender or accusatory song about being used or being the silent backbone. The column is literal and also a stand in for a person who does the heavy lifting emotionally or financially.
Real life scenario: You pay rent for two people. You buy groceries for someone who says they will make it up. That is a column moment. Turn the unpaid labor into architecture and the story becomes cleaner and meaner at once.
Angle B: Column as division
Promise line: We live in different columns of the same city.
This angle frames distance and separation. Columns split space and stories. Use it for songs about class difference, political divides, or romantic estrangement.
Real life scenario: Your ex lives on the other side of the borough. The news your family reads lives in a different column from your feed. That live difference is a column you can sing across.
Angle C: Newspaper column as voice
Promise line: Your opinion sat like a headline on my chest.
Write as if a published column was an intrusion. Use the idea of editorial voice to talk about unwanted advice, public shame, or the way someone wrote you out of a story.
Real life scenario: Someone posts a takedown of your friend. That takedown reads like a column and you can react to it like a person saving face in the chorus.
Angle D: Spreadsheet column as data and surveillance
Promise line: You reduced me to a cell in your column.
This is the dark, modern angle. The column becomes cold metrics, follower counts, receipts. Use it to write about being quantified, ghosted, or scrolled past.
Real life scenario: You open an app and see someone who used to be a person listed as a number. That is a lyric waiting to happen.
Angle E: Column as poetic device
Promise line: My words stack like columns and stumble on their shadows.
Use columns as a meta lyric about writing. A column of text, a column of sound, a stanza. This lets you be clever without losing heart.
Real life scenario: You write a column for a campus paper and fall in love with someone who comments under it. That awkward interaction can be both comic and tender in a song.
Choose One Promise and Write It Plain
Before you write lyrics, do this: write one sentence that states the emotional truth you want the song to deliver. Make it plain like a text to your roommate. This is your compass and your filter.
Examples
- I held you like an old column and the roof still fell.
- They printed my name next to a lie and called it a column.
- You tracked me into a spreadsheet and sorted me out of your life.
- I keep a column of our photos and one of the things you never said.
Turn that sentence into a short title or a chorus seed. If it sings, you are onto something.
Lyric Devices for Column Songs
These are tools you can use to make the column image do emotional work.
Personification
Make the column a person who refuses to talk back or admits too much. For example: The Corinthian whispered my secrets into the limestone. Personification turns a static object into an actor in your scene.
Double meaning
Use a single line that simultaneously reads as architecture and as relationships or as data. Example line: I keep you in the leftmost column. It can mean the first thing I think of or the first cell of a spreadsheet. The listener enjoys decoding the two levels.
Anaphora
Anaphora is the repetition of a phrase at the start of lines. It works like a drum. Example: We stacked columns of plates. We stacked columns of promises. Repetition builds a ritual quality which makes your chorus feel like a chant.
Image stack
Put three column images in a row to escalate. Example: Ionic hair, Doric jaw, Corinthian laugh. The list creates texture and a surprising specificity that slaps harder than general adjectives.
Callback
Introduce a column phrase in verse one and return to it with new context in verse two. The listener feels narrative movement without explanation.
Enjambment
Enjambment is when a sentence runs from one line to the next in poetry. In songs you can use the idea to slide images across bars. Example: The pillar holds the ceiling but / not the weight of our late nights. This keeps the line moving and prevents a chorus from feeling like a textbook caption.
Prosody and Melody Tips for Column Lyrics
Prosody is the alignment of natural speech stress with musical stress. If you do not match speech stress to the beat, the line will sound awkward. Prosody is crucial when you use long technical words like Corinthian. Sing them out loud before you lock the melody. If a word feels clumsy, trade it for an image that fits the mouth.
- Place heavy words on strong beats. Heavy words are nouns or emotional verbs like hold, break, print, delete.
- Use open vowels on long notes. Words like roof, stone, loud, you are great on sustained notes.
- If a column name is awkward, abbreviate or break it into a shorter phrase. Corinthian can become Cory in a playful song or can be sung as cor-in-thian with rhythm to carry it.
- Test by speaking the line and then singing it. If the speech cadence feels forced, rewrite.
Rhyme Choices That Keep the Image Sharp
Columns invite internal rhyme and family rhyme more than perfect rhyme. Perfect rhyme can feel sing song when your subject is architectural. Instead, use slant rhymes, internal rhymes, and repeated consonant sounds for texture.
Rhyme ideas
- Column with solemn is a good slant rhyme. Column is pronounced like col-um. Pair it with consonant echoes that feel intentional.
- Use end rhyme on the emotional word not the technical word. For example put the rhyme on hold, cold, told and keep column as a stable image.
- Try internal rhyme like: I run my thumb along the column like a rule of thumb. The repeated thumb makes the listener land on the image twice.
Song Structures That Support Column Songs
Columns suggest repetition and stacking which means structures with repeated motifs work well. Here are shapes you can try with quick notes on why they fit.
Structure A: Verse Pre Chorus Chorus Repeat
Use the pre chorus to shift the meaning of the column image from literal to metaphor. The chorus carries the emotional promise.
Structure B: Verse Chorus Verse Chorus Bridge Chorus
Use the bridge to tear the column metaphor apart and reveal the human cost. A bridge that strips instrumentation will sound like the column finally being inspected.
Structure C: Strophic form with a chorus like a pillar
Strophic form means you repeat the same music for each verse and then add a recurring chorus. That gives a rhythmic stacking feeling like columns in a colonnade. If your lyrics evolve each verse then the repeated music will feel like stability while the words change.
Arrangement And Production Ideas
Production can make the column idea audible. Use sounds that suggest stone, press, typewriter, or building noise. Or go minimal and let the image alone carry weight.
- Stone texture Layer an electric piano with a resonant low pass to create a warm stone like bed under the vocal.
- Typewriter percussion Use a light click or a typewriter sample to suggest newspaper columns or writing. Put it on the off beat for tension.
- Column drop Remove harmonic support on a line that mentions collapse. Silence is powerful. When you sing I watched you go, remove everything for one bar to simulate fall.
- Stacked vocals For chorus, stack harmonies like a colonnade. Start with one voice then add an upper harmony then a lower double on the final chorus to give the sense of physical stacking.
Title Ideas You Can Steal And Twist
Titles are hooks. These are short and singable. Pick one and write variations.
- Left Column
- Corinthian Heart
- Columns and Receipts
- Stacked Photos
- Print This
- Cell A1
- Two Columns One City
- The Pillar You Left
- Headline on My Chest
- Column of Your Name
Writing Prompts And Exercises
Do these drills for fifteen to thirty minutes. Each is aimed to produce raw lines you can edit into a chorus or verse.
Object Swap
Pick one column related object. Examples: Corinthian capital, a manila folder with clippings, a ledger, a marble pillar, a smartphone screen. Write four lines that make the object do human things. Ten minutes.
Angle Drill
Write three different chorus one per angle listed earlier. Keep each chorus to two lines. Time ten minutes. Compare and choose which has the most emotional clarity.
Vowel Pass
Play a two chord loop and sing on vowels for two minutes. Mark moments that feel like a hook. Put the phrase column or capitals on that moment and try three one line versions around it. Five minutes.
Spreadsheet Confessional
Write a chorus as if you are reading your life in a table. Each line is a column title like Name, Date, Emotion, Status. Turn that into a human lyric. Ten minutes.
Headline Game
Write five fake newspaper headlines that involve you or the person you are singing about. Pick the funniest or meanest one and turn it into a chorus hook. Ten minutes.
Before And After Line Rewrites
Here are raw lines and polished versions so you can see the exact surgery that makes column lyrics sing.
Before: You were like a pillar and I leaned on you.
After: I learned your shadow well. I leaned on your limestone until my hands got used to cold.
Before: They wrote about me in a column and it hurt.
After: They ran my name in a column like they were auctioning my mistakes. I watched strangers bid on my life.
Before: We have columns of photos on our phone.
After: Our photos sit in neat columns on my screen. You are always third from the top like a weird recurring ad.
Before: You sorted me out of your life.
After: You put me in the wrong column and smeared me with a highlight. Now I am a cell with no row.
The Crime Scene Edit For Column Lyrics
Run this pass on every verse and chorus. It will strip the academic and keep the visceral.
- Find abstractions Underline any abstract word like support, separation, division. Replace each with a physical detail you can see or hear.
- Time stamp Add a small time or place crumb. People remember stories with time and place and a column can become a city block or a breakfast table.
- Cut the thesis line If the first line explains the feeling, cut it. Show the feeling instead.
- Test the vowel If your chorus relies on a long note, pick words with friendly vowels. If you cannot sing the chorus on the couch, you cannot sing it on stage.
- Delete filler Remove any line that repeats information without adding a new image or action.
Common Mistakes And Quick Fixes
- Mistake Treating column as only literal. Fix Layer meaning. Add a line that flips the object into a person or a metric.
- Mistake Using technical names without ear care. Fix Break difficult words into rhythm or swap them for friendlier images.
- Mistake Over explaining your metaphor. Fix Remove explanatory lines and trust the listener to get two levels.
- Mistake Writing a chorus that sounds like a lecture. Fix Make the chorus singable. Keep short lines and a repeated tag.
Demo Workflow To Finish Fast
- Pick your angle and write the one sentence promise. Turn it in to a chorus seed of one to three lines.
- Make a two chord loop. Do a vowel pass and mark the gestures that feel like hooks.
- Place your chorus seed on the strongest gesture. Trim words until the line breathes.
- Draft verse one with two distinct images. Use the crime scene edit to replace abstract words with objects.
- Record a plain demo with minimal production. Use a dry vocal and one instrument so the lyric sits clear.
- Play for two friends and ask one question. Which line pulled you? Change only what raised confusion.
- Polish the final demo by adding one production touch that sells the column idea like a typewriter or a stone texture.
Lyrics Examples You Can Model
Below are two full example choruses and a verse seed each. Use them as blueprints not templates.
Example 1: Architectural breakup chorus
I learned how to lean on stone. I learned how to hold the room while you ran the exits. The Corinthian face you left in the hallway still laughs when it rains.
Verse seed
The doorman remembers your name. He lights a cigarette when he thinks of us. My coat still smells like the lobby you loved.
Example 2: Spreadsheet confessional chorus
They labeled me A3 and left me blank. You sorted me out of your life like a file you never bothered to save. I am a cell with no history but a lot of unread.
Verse seed
You taught me how to make a list. Column one was reasons to stay. Column two was reasons to leave. I clicked autosum and found only your excuses.
Terms And Acronyms Explained With Relatable Scenarios
Prosody
Definition: Prosody is the match between natural speech stress and musical stress. Scenario: You say the line I held the roof up slow in normal speech and it catches a beat on the wrong word when you sing it. Prosody fix means moving the stressed word to the strong beat so the line feels honest and not clunky.
Anaphora
Definition: Repetition of a phrase at the start of lines. Scenario: You repeat I stacked my things three times in a chorus and it becomes a chant. The chant feels like stacking plates which matches the column image.
Enjambment
Definition: When a sentence flows over a line break. Scenario: Your line ends mid thought and finishes on the next line which creates forward motion like walking past pillars in a corridor.
Strophic form
Definition: A structure where each verse uses the same music. Scenario: You sing the same three chord progression for every verse while the words tell a new part of the story like columns that look the same but hold different graffiti each morning.
Hook
Definition: The catchiest part of a song usually the chorus or a repeated phrase. Scenario: The line Left Column stays in your head because it is short and weird and you hum it in the shower.
Topline
Definition: The melody and lyric written over a track. Scenario: You hum a melody over a drum loop and then write the words that fit that melody. That combined melody and lyric is the topline.
FAQ schema explained
Definition: FAQ schema is structured data in JSON format that you add to your web page so search engines show your Q and A in search results. Scenario: When you look up how to write a song about columns, a neat dropdown with quick answers appears under the search listing. That is the benefit of FAQ schema.
Pop Culture And Real Life Examples To Steal From
Architectural love and heartbreak appear everywhere. Think of the way some films use a staircase or a pillar to mark a turning point. The same technique works in songs. When you use a column image, borrow the cinematic habit of lighting and angle. A column lit from below is a better antagonist than a column lit straight on.
Newspaper columns as public shaming or praise are all over social media. Turn that modern habit into a lyric line that shows how public opinion can act like a load bearing wall. People who have had a tweet get blown up can relate instantly.
Spreadsheet language is perfect for the modern snarky verse. Saying You put my name in column D is funny to anyone who has been reduced to a tag or a label. It also works as a bitter line in the chorus.
Common Questions Answered
Can I write a serious song about columns without sounding dumb
Yes. The key is to commit to one emotional idea and show it with small details. Use the column as a visual anchor and then give it a human cost or an unexpected twist. Avoid academic lists and prefer breathing images.
Which column type should I use if I want to sound clever
Corinthian sounds smart and formal because it is a long word. Use it if you want a tongue in cheek tone. If you want grit, pick Doric or just say pillar. The smartest move is to test each name in your mouth with the melody before you decide.
How do I avoid sounding pretentious when using architectural terms
Use them sparingly and always pair them with a daily detail. Pair Corinthian with coffee stains or Doric with a busted elevator. That contrast keeps you human.
Is the spreadsheet metaphor overused
It can be dumb if you lean on it for every line. The trick is to use it as an abrupt image in a chorus where it shocks the listener into modernity. One crisp spreadsheet line in a sea of tactile images hits harder than a whole chorus of cells and formulas.
How do I make the chorus catchy when the subject is odd
Make the chorus short and repetitive. Use a ring phrase that repeats the title. Keep vowels open and long on the sustained notes. If Left Column is your title, sing it twice with a small twist on the third repeat.